My Dream Room

My dream room.
There's a king sized bed.
A little table just beside it.
When i woke up, i saw a wall in front.
Just behind the wall, there's a long chair.
Where i can lay down a bit to see the view.
From the chair, i see through the glass wall.
A view from a skyscraper.
A mass city far below.
Maybe i should have a telescope to peek through to see the people.
Yes, my room is in a very tall building.
Hundreds of levels above the ground.
I want to be far from people.
That brings sadness and hatred.
Sad of being left behind after living together.
Hate of becoming obliged to care so that you also treated the same.
In that dream room.
I have my own kitchen, just behind the bed.
And on the leftside of the bed, there's the bathroom, a little pool tub, and the clothing room.
Where all things that come out in the tv advertisement became available.
Anything. From pizza, soap, or shoe.
I wish i got evrything. FREE.
But that ain't gonna happen.
Because it is after all just a dream.

My dream room.

Marriage

24 yrs of life experience, the most critical aspect that i view about marriage, is responsibility. The care for each other. The mix of religion and culture disciplines, where we must satisfy both families. And the anticipation of the next generation. Where more responsibilities lies ahead.

I've read a webpage that says:

"The fact is that all marriages have problems that cause conflict and strain the relationship. Among the most common problems:

• Money. There never seems to be enough, or if there is, one person is upset about how the other spends it.
• Sex. It's the reason 45 percent of couples seek marriage counseling. Usually, one partner desires sex more often and on different terms than the other.
• Work. Partners have different role expectations about who does what within and outside of the home.
• Children. Couples may disagree over how to raise and discipline children."

There's nothing that i can disagree with all of these points. Every marriage, youth or old, would face all those problems and deal with it varily.

For me, i really don't even know yet if i'll pass all of these circumstances blissfully, or wacky, or none at all. Hoped not the least.

Terakhir - edited

Mengapakah kita tak mampu terima takdirnya
Tak mampu berserah jiwa dan raga
Apakah kita tak mampu memiliki
Lelah bagiku
Tenat jadiku

Apakah salahnya
Kita menjadi begini
Tinggal sendiri
Terus sendiri
Mimpi yang ku damba
Kau tak dapat jadikan nyata
Jelas bagiku

Melepaskanmu
Bukan mudah bagiku untuk melalui semua ini
Pabila kenangan kita mengusik jiwa dan hati
Kala malam tidurku tak lena mengenangkanmu
Ku cuba perlahankan
Separuh masa ku hilang pabila bersamamu
Episod cinta mimpiku kini tiada lagi
Tiada lagi untuk menyakiti jiwa dan hati

Oh tuhan
Ku mahu yang terbaik
Terbaik buatku
Insan kerdil ini

Oh tuhan
Noktahkan keputusan ini
Tolonglah dia
Dia terakhir buatku

Ratusan Purnama - edited

Lirik_akemi_aisara

Ratusan purnama berlalu
Tapi cinta tak pernah berlalu
Walau ku usir engkau di hidupku
Tapi cintaku tetap diam

Ratusan purnama berlalu
Sendirian aku tanpa cinta
Tak pernah ada cinta yang lain
Hatiku terbuka hanya untukmu

Duhai cinta enggan menawar rasa
Gelombang anganmu terlalu berlebih

Berderik-derik bunyi jantungku
Bila ku kenang wajahmu
Biar jauh jarak jodoh kita
Namun hati dan jiwaku
Tetap juga setia di sisimu

Duhai cinta sulit ku luahkan
Diam dan dinginku merana
Ribuan hari kumelayanimu
Membaca semua rasa hatimu
Mengering raga ini mengharapkan
Ratusan purnama
Cinta kita berlabuh

Ratusan purnama
Cinta kita berlabuh jua
Ratusan purnama
Cinta kita 
Berlabuh

DENGARLAH BINTANG HATIKU

DE MEISES

Dengarlah bintang hatiku
Aku akan menjagamu

Dalam hidup dan matiku
Hanya kau lah yang ku tuju

Dan teringat janjiku padamu
Suatu hari pasti akan ku tepati

Aku akan menjagamu
Semampu dan sebisaku
Walau ku tahu
Ragamu tak utuh

Ku terima kekuranganmu
Dan ku tak akan mengeluh

Karena bagiku  engkaulah nyawaku
Karena bagiku  engkaulah nyawaku

ROZA ROSLAN – BUKAN SEKADAR RESEPI (2012)

Penceritaan santai. Penuh pengisian. Sentiasa diselangi puji-pujian ke hadrat Ilahi. Alhamdulillah. Subhanallah. Allahu akbar. Sehingga pembacanya juga ikut bertasbih, walaupun tanpa sedar. 3 minggu dalam simpanan. Kini tiba masa untuknya pulang menemui pemiliknya – Perpustakaan Negeri Kedah. Insya-Allah, jika dimudahkan rezeki, akan kubeli menggunakan baucer buku 1M yg masih utuh 5 keping dalam dompetku ini. Kerana sejarah yang dimiliki, membuatkan resepi tersebut kelihatan mengujakan untuk dicuba. Walaupun ada yang kelihatan biasa, seperti nasi goreng atau jemput2, namun sejarah di sebalik penemuan resepinya membuat diriku kagum. Terdetik juga untuk mengikut jejak beliau, mencatat resepi hasil tangan sendiri kurniaan Ilahi, seperti yang tercatit dalam dua buah diari resepi ‘keramat’ ibuku. Cuma yang terkurang hanyalah cerita di sebalik resepi. Sesungguhnya aku masih di bab pertama atau kedua dalam pengisahan cerita. Dan masih memasak untuk diri sendiri setiap hari. Tiada sensory evaluator tetap seperti Katie atau Emak, Mak Wa, dan Wan.

Labis::Kg. Paya Jakas, Jementah, Segamat:: Institut Teknologi MARA (ITM) Dungun::KL::Besut, Terengganu:: Dundee, Scotland, UK::Kuching::Bangor, North Wales, UK::Madinah al-Munawwarah

Kehidupan yang sangat berbeza. Antara aku dan beliau. Hidup serba sederhana. Bermastautin dari satu tempat ke satu tempat. Di dalam bukunya juga diakui, beliau dan suami telah menikmati pelbagai makanan penduduk tempatan di melebihi 20 negara yang berbeza. Berbeza sekali denganku, walaupun setelah hidup setua 22 tahun, hanya pernah menjejak ke sempadan Thailand, tidak pernah lagi menggunakan pasport antarabangsa. Beliau yang hanya sekitar 2x ganda umurku, telah mengharungi pelbagai pengalaman bermakna yang memberi pengajaran tersendiri. Begitu jua ibuku yang hampir seusia beliau, dilahirkan pada 1963.

Pun begitu,aku tertarik dengan frasa “Nikmat Allah yang mana satukah yang mahu kita dustakan?”. Walau membesar dalam serba kekurangan, dengan kehendak yang selalunya sangat sukar dipenuhi, mereka belajar berdikari, berdiri atas kaki sendiri, mencuba pelbagai alternatif yang akhirnya menerbitkan perkongsian ilmu yang bermanfaat. Di satu generasi lain pula, dari permulaan pandai bertatih sehingga ke menara gading, segala kehendak cuba dipenuhi. Disogok pula dengan rencana ilmu tanpa sempadan, yang kini hanya berada di hujung jari, tiada lagi istilah keseronokan dalam mencari ilmu. Segalanya tersedia di depan mata. Hanya perlu menaip dan klik ‘search’. Jadi, bagaimana pula dengan kesudahan generasi Y ini? Jawapannya kemungkinan besar sekali akan tertuai, pada generasi penyambung seterusnya. Apakah gaya dan lagak generasi tersebut pula, terserah kepada Allah Azzawajalla. Wallahu’alam.

White Collar (Season 1-2)

::Neal Caffery:: VS ::Peter Burke::

They story unfolds when Neal is nearly being out of prison..which is only about a few months left out of a four years' sentence.

His girlfriend show up, saying a threatening goodbye. Being ''awry'' of that, Neal took a desperate escape and this is where Agent Burke stood in the way, caught him for the second time. Thinking out of the box, Neal offer his service to the FBI in turn for a chance to stay 'outside' prison. Henceforth, he could squeeze a way of getting in touch with Kate.

Being with Burke for quite some time, they formed a tie, for which I see that relation, like father and son kind of thing. Neal being in youth, always liked adventure and naughty slacks. While Burke puts him in control, make sure he does not go out of bound.

Following this series until Season 2, I think I can make a bet on the ending. Up to here, its said that Kate was killed in the airplane and Neal's busy chasing after whoever the culprit is. The main suspect was Fowler, the FBI agent who lead Neal to get onto the plane in the first place. And so the controversy goes on.

So far as I'm concerned, seeing that Burke got the most access on Neal's background, and seeing Neal's attitude towards life. What would Kate do? Well, during the three years Neal being dormant in prison, there is just no way she'd do nothing about it. Well, its just a hypothesis. If Kate really want to spend her lifetime with Neal, she wouldn't want it be always on the run, like Neal always used to do. 

[Refer S1EP05 - the call between Neal and Kate]
Kate: Listen, i need you to tell me where you hid everything.

Neal: What?

Kate: The money, the bonds, the art -- all of it.

Neal: Why?

Kate: He wants something -- Something you took, something you hid.

Neal: I hid a lot of things.

Kate: Well, then, give him everything. If he gets what he wants, he'll let me come back to you.

Neal: Who is he?

Kate:
I can't tell you. it's too dangerous for you.
This is the only way you can help me.
You always told me I had to trust you.
Well, now you have to trust me.
I want to come home.
Please just tell me where you hid everything.
I want to come home.

Neal: It's the only leverage I got. Just stay there, okay? I'm coming up.

--and Kate went missing--

Nevertheless, Kate's identity was always being a mystery and hardly revealed.